“Some people don’t even know Matthew is dead, they still get birthday notifications, they go to his Facebook wall and write ‘Happy Birthday’. It’s not very nice.”
Hayley Smith’s husband Matthew died of cancer two years ago. He was 33 at the time. Hayley is still wondering what to do with Matthew’s social media accounts.
“I tried to memorialize Matthew’s Facebook account. And to do that, you have to upload his death certificate,” says the UK-based charity worker.
“I’ve tried to do that over 20 times, but it won’t take it – nothing happens. I don’t have the energy to contact Facebook to resolve it.”
What is a memorialized account?
With the advancement of technology, billions of people around the world are using social media. As a result, what happens to someone’s online presence after death has become a big topic of discussion.
The account remains active until a relative notifies the social media platform of the person's death.
Some social media platforms allow the user to close their profile if a close relative reports the death. Others offer different options.
For example, on Meta-owned Facebook and Instagram, when a person's death certificate is provided, the account is either deleted or memorialized - meaning the account is temporarily frozen and commemorates the user. During this time, others can post photos and memories to the account.
The deceased person's account name will have the words "In Memoriam" next to it. No one will be able to log in to or use the account unless the user provides a "legacy contact" before death.
A "legacy contact" is usually a family member or friend. They can manage the content of the deceased person's account or request to deactivate it.
Facebook does not show memorialized accounts to potential virtual friends in the ‘People You May Know’ or ‘People You May Know’ list. And friends of the deceased do not receive any birthday notifications.
In the case of Google-owned YouTube, Gmail and Google Photos, users have the opportunity to change what happens to accounts and their data after a certain period of inactivity by going to the ‘inactive account’ settings.
In the case of X (formerly Twitter) accounts, there is no opportunity to memorialize someone’s profile. In that case, the account can only be deactivated if the person dies or the account owner is unable to use it.
“There are different approaches, but all companies prioritize the privacy of the deceased,” says Joe Ted, technology correspondent for the BBC World Service.
“No login information will be given and you will only be able to see certain things, such as photos and videos, based on specific requests. Even there, a court order is sometimes required.”
Newer social media platforms like TikTok and Snapchat, however, do not have such provisions, he said.
Should we prepare a digital legacy will?
Cybercrime expert and former head of the high-tech crime department at the Serbian Interior Ministry, Sasa Zivanovic, warned that problems could arise if the data, photos or other content of a deceased person’s active profile fell into the wrong hands.
This could be done by downloading some of the profile data or by taking control of the entire account.
“Photos, information and videos can be used to create fake accounts under the same name. And money can also be collected from acquaintances and friends who are not aware that the person has died,” he said.
James Norris, president of the UK’s Digital Legacy Association, stressed that it is important for everyone to think about what is being uploaded to social networks and to back them up if possible.
He gave the example of Facebook, where you can download all your previous photos and videos and send them to your relatives.
“So if I get diagnosed with a terminal illness and I have a young child who is not on Facebook, I can download all my photos and videos. I can delete messages from my inbox because I don’t want my child to see my private messages, I can like my favorite photos and write a story with each one,” he says.
He thinks it’s very important to plan ahead for what happens to social media accounts after death. He also advises everyone to prepare a digital legacy will.
“At the end of the day, social networking is a business. These platforms are not the guardians of your digital legacy,” he says. “You are the guardians of your digital legacy.”
But he thinks social media platforms can make the process easier for grieving relatives.
“Things like raising awareness about what the platform offers, what kind of arrangements it has are important because not everyone knows they exist,” he says.